Overselpt, but for a good reason.

So I like to think of myself as a total TV, Movie, Radio snob. I know what's good and what's trash. I go for indie films vs. big budget, I discovered Emo with Jimmy Eat World NOT Dashboard Confessional (which I dig, but they weren't first!) blah blah blah.

I am however a closeted soap opera fan. Well again I am a total snob and I only watch General Hospital. The rest are for losers. Last night it must have been in my subconscious because I had a dream, a very juicy awesome dream, that I was dating Dr. Patrick Drake. Who's Real name is Jason Thompson (my husband is also Jason... interesting) and he would look like this...

Oh that's Right Dr. Robin Scorpio, I am all over your man. Well in my dream.. but hey I'm not complaining. In the dream I couldn't find him and we were of course in some crisis situation, and someone, I don't know who had fixed the crisis situation, and we were all happy again. But I still couldn't find my man, Dr. Patrick Drake. Then lights shown down upon the earth and there he was fresh from the shower, shirtless with his hot tight jeans and wet tousled hair. He leaned down to kiss me... and what did I say?

"You know you're really tall".

What a loser. I legitimately overslept this morning, but the more I go over this dream in my head the more I totally see that I really had no other choice, I had to see this through.

How did we ever end up in a world with internet piracy with this little piece of Inspiration?

So What if I took a year Off...

Sorry Internet, I have not been a loyal blogger. I have a good excuse! I am 8 months pregnant!! Hooray!

So to catch up, here's my description of my pregnancy thus far

Month 1-3: TIRED and Backache. Not hungry, pukey in the morning.
Month 4-7: Amazing. Tons of energy, not alot of weight gain, developed a small pregnant belly at around 7 months. Ate 392818030289 boxes of cereal and loved it!
Month 7-Now: Achy hips, preggo belly, still eating tons of cereal. Ready to have this kid!

And, its a girl, hooray again!

So as of today,I'm still working and actually today I had a really hilarious experience. I work at a PBS Affiliate, so today I took Clifford the Big Red Dog to our local Borders bookstore for Story Hour. The event went really well, accept when we had double the people we were expecting and ran out of free books, and parents got all pissy.. what the hell. THE EVENT WAS FREE! YOUR KID STILL GOT PENCILS AND BOOKMARKS AND STICKERS, stingy soccer mom.

Anyhoo... so everything was going well, I was walking Clifford back to the room so my costume wearer could get changed back into human, and this little super cute boy with corn rows said, in the most amazing 5 year old Tracy Morgan voice ever..

"PSHH...that's just a man in a suit"

Made my day.

I'm Sorry, But our First Lady is Better Looking than Your First Lady

When was the last time we had a first lady who looked like this?

If I were Mr. Obama I'd be looking at her like that too. I'm sorry, buy who do you want representing the women of our nation Michelle or a Bush? I'll take Michelle any day.

Summer, The Perfect Time to Buy Other People's Shit

Living in Northern NY we really have to pack in the summer experience. We really have only 3 months of the 12 to be outside and enjoy it before we are raped and pillaged by massive Lake Effect Snow Storms, and spend all our free time shoveling and snow blowing our pooped lined driveways. Poor dogs have no where else to go!

Anyhow... so one of my favorite past times is the yard sale Saturday. We have full weekends here were local "villages" will have a Village Wide Sale. We'll I work for public television, my pay checks aren't huge, so if I need a new toaster or some dirty romantic novels, I'll wait for the sales. I've got some really great deals so far, books, lamps, toaster, shelving, just to name a few, but what i really want to talk about and bring to your attention are a couple of the freaking weird things people are trying to sell! So as any normal person would do, I took out my cell phone and took a few pictures.

1.

First of All, where does one acquire a metallic pink faceless dog, wearing a Santa Hat and who thinks that someone else would want it? I am really bummed that I didn't get a chance to go back there and see if someone bought it. I wonder what they were charging for it? Free with purchase I hope. Market it as a good discipline tool for kids. "If you keep acting up you little shit, Santa isn't coming... the Christmas crazy dog is!

I know that would keep me in line!

2.

OK What the F! First of all, I understand if you are a collector, but usually collectors keep their stuff in good shape, and by good shape I MEAN WITH CLOTHES ON! There were literally boxes and boxes of these dolls, and what's with the lone Santa Suit? Creepy, dude, Creepy.





Oh right.. there's more.

Messed up!

Gotta Love Summer!

Guitar Hero: Obsesed

So my fiance is a HUGE Metallica fan. So when they released Guitar Hero:Metallica, he was first in line. Now, neither of us had played Guitar Hero before this... I know I know.. the most popular game ever or whatever. Blah Blah Blah.

We'll I'll sort of take that back because there was one really drunken night where I was lead singer for RockBand at a friends house. After about 8 Grey Goose and Ruby Red's I sounded AMAZING. I bet you 100 bucks you couldn't tell the difference between me or Karen O of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs... however thanks to cell phone technology I was able to record myself and was embarrassed for the next week. BUT WHATEVER THIS ISN'T ABOUT MY SINGING SKILLS.

So when fiance brought Guitar Hero home, I watched him play...enjoyed the music, and didn't think twice about it. I have never really been into video games, I let my little sister take care of that.. who by the way, can beat just about any song on expert, you can't even see her fingers...

So one day I'm sitting around bored, Fiance wasn't home... so I picked up the Guitar...

BEST GAME EVER! I can't stop playing it..its like heroine for someone who is too cheap and scared to actually use heroine. I love it. I am pretty too (even though its still on easy.. HEY THE METALLICA VERSION IS HARDER THAN THE OTHER PRISSY LEDGENS OF ROCK OR WHATEVER VERSIONS)

My eyes turn completely red after about 2 hours of not blinking and the other day I almost peed my pants because Metallica songs never end! Try playing Merciful Fate... Fiance calls it 12 minutes of Satan... maybe its because you eyes fall out of your head and arms fall off when you hit about 9 minutes.

So friends...if I don't answer my cell...

If Only Life Were This Simple

N: Uncle Travie, I saw my boyfriend today.

Travie: You can't have a boyfriend.  I'll beat him up.

N: Noooo....you can't do that.  He's going to be in my wedding.

Travie: Well what does he do for a job?

N: Ummm...he has a sandbox.

Nostalgia

So back in my AIM days.. when I couldn't do anything without letting the world know what I was doing via My AIM away message or my "profile".... I used to make these long lists of things that I liked and didn't like. Pure statements of me just kind of trying to be funny and ironic, however, informative. So for some reason when I woke up this morning I thought of these list that I would do and decided to bring those back to life one more time. If anyone appreciates this it will be Devon Gillan and Matt Rogers, my two favorite people from college.


I like...
putting on jeans immediately after coming out of the dryer, Reese's, spaghetti with meat sauce, boys with tattoos, fiance's with beards, dogs named anakin, cats named Vader, mozzarella cheese, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Davey Havok (still), men's watches, fuchsia, walks, warm days, target's dollar section, boneless buffalo wings, big earrings, snuffalufagus, getting paid, notebooks, a good pen, house plants, painting a new room, my nephew, reading the UK Daily Mail, tetris, fun post-its, Dr. Pepper, Kristen Stewart, my wedding dress, baking, asian babies, bobby pins, zebras.

I don't' like...
snow, washing dishes, lotion, cream cheese, baby pink, Italian sausage, rude people, The Jonas Brothers, grant writing, math, push ups, pull ups (the exercise not the diaper thing), sweet pickles, wings that are too spicy, bbq pizza, 19 versions of CSI, bossy people, the guy who looks like Justin Timberlake (a little) on American Idol, cold feet, wet socks, Care Bears, people who don't respond quickly to my emails, Diet Pepsi, crushed red peppers, spam email, the lure of the lottery, how popcorn will aways get stuck somewhere in your teeth, losing touch, FYE, that I really liked Twilight, changing the clocks, hornets/wasps, Lady GaGa, feta cheese, flat hair.


Ironically My likes are a bit more mature.. my dislikes... pretty much exactly the same.

Your List?

A Waste of $40

Sherbert Kisses

The Fiance is holding Carson our Nephew and he blows those loud raspberry kisses on his tummy..

Fiance: "Look he loves the sherbet kisses..."

Me, as I am slowly realizing what he said versus what he meant and Laughing so Hard I'm peeing a little:

"Don't you mean Raspberries"

Fiance: "You know what I meant asshole."

Me: Still Laughing uncontrollably.

The True Love of My Life.

So for anyone who knows me really well, they'll tell you that I am a pop culture buff, nerd, TV marathon watcher... loser. Ask me almost anything about TV or Music since 1983 and I can probably give you the answer. And considering I have an associates degree and Bachelors in TELEVISION I can go way before my time and pull facts out of no where.. its sad really that i am $40,000 in debt and all I can tell you is that Monica from Friends was the first character to mention her period on TV and that the first sound to be receive wirelessly was "S" in Morse code (this tidbit thanks to Mr. Kal Socolof of Herkimer CCC.) I am the wikipedia of my friends and family. My sister will call me to ask some randome question about What was the job of Uncle Jesse's wife Rebecca on Full House, it never fails, after I give her the answer with out missing a beat.. "Duh, Danny Tanner's Co-Anchor", that do I realize that I am on speaker phone and a room full of people explode with "oh man.. I TOLD YOU DUDE!"

Now, You Tube didn't' happen yesterday or anything but shit man can I waste some time there. I think I am in head over heals slap you on the ass in love with it. I love that if I want to reminisce about my childhood and watch a full episode of Kids Incorporated.. I can. It's comforting to know that its ok that I had a crush on a cartoon and If i want to watch a 4min 24 second clip of Daria just to see Trent I can! Endless possibilities. How can you resist reliving your favorite moments of Saved By the Bell, you know the episode when Jesse gets hooked on caffeine pills and sings "I'm so excited" over and over.. until Zack confronts her or if you get in an argument with your fiance about what as the Second Video ever Played on MTV and everyone knows that the first was "Video Killed the Radio Star.. the answer, "You Better Run" By Pat Benetar is only one search away. When I was in high school and college those VH1 clip shows were really popular.. and still are a bit... and my dream job was to be an editor for them and just sit and go through hours and hours of footage. Now, can make my own clip show of Rider Strong from Boy Meets World and Old Cheri Oteri SNL clips.

I kind of hate that my kids or anyone else ever for that matter, won't have the experience of getting to relieve your favorite show from your childhood 15 years later, because now all you have to do is wait 10 minutes after the episode has aired and BAM.. there it is on the web some where. Hopefully my kids will want to go outside and play while mommy sits in side and laughs her ass off at a clip of Steve Erkel Shrieking..."Did I do That..."

Alas.. I'll leave you with Possibly my favorite childhood memory...




They really don't make kids shows this awesome anymore.

I love You, You Tube.

How To Piss Off a Blue Collar Man's Man in 15 Seconds

Me: You smell weird...like flowery.

Him: What?!?

Me: Your hands-they smell like girl's lotion

Him: Why in the hell would I be using girl's lotion?

Me: I don't know. I'm just telling you what I think you smell like.

Him: So you think I smell like a girl?

Me: Right now you do. I mean if you like that kind of stuff, you're welcome to use anything of mine...

Him: Yeah right! Just so you know, it's called GoJo and it's hand cleaner for mechanics.

Me: Lady Mechanics?

My Version of Some else's version of a Blog entry

I read this blog post by Maggie Mason of MightyGirl.com and she was submitting her version of this blog entry. And being a follower from time to time... and thinking that both entries were really intriguing and genius.. here is my list of things that pop into my head against my will...

That I actually failed that Intro to Business class and am Paying for a Degree I don't have.

When I get out of the shower I open the bathroom door and there is a stranger on my couch.

A water snake in my toilet.

I buy my wedding dress at the perfect size and find out the next day that I'm pregnant.

Someone hands me a newborn and it slips through my fingers.

An intruder hiding in my house for days without anyone noticing.

Something that I really said a long time ago that I now realize was completely embarrassing and immature... plays over and over.


It's weird I know... but it happens to everyone.. what would be on your list.

Grab Your Backpack - Let's Shop!

It was recently announced that Dora the Explorer will be getting a makeover this fall. Now, instead of a wholesome little girl who loves going on adventures and solving problems, Dora will be heading to the mall. Hooray! Just the kind of role model I want my daughters to have! You can read the full press release here.

Apparently the Nickelodeon and Mattel have found out (from who?) that the Kindergarten set are too cool for Dora, tossing her aside for dolls like Bratz. So they have decided to do the creepiest thing possible and make Dora look like a slut. They have released a sillhouette of what the "new" Dora will look like:

Yup. I'm a little scared too. Why is she standing like that? Is she wearing a mini skirt? Dora doesn't wear skirts-she wears shorts! And how can she expect to go on adventures wearing ballet flats? Where are her sneakers?

Now I have done my share of bitching about Dora. In fact, my girls can only watch it if I am not in the room because I really just cannot handle it. But it's not a show for me. It's for preschoolers. And they love it. My 3 year old has a larger Spanish vocabulary than I have, and I studied that language for 4 years in high school. When we're coloring, she asks me to pass her "amarillo" when she wants the yellow crayon. Will we be learning the Spanish word for "totally" when the new Dora is revealed?

Kids outgrow things. It happens. I think the better way to approach this may have been to create a family member (a la Diego) for the older crowd. Maybe an older bobble-headed cousin if that's the demographic they want to reach out to. To make your cartoon characters age is stange and creepy. Especially since so many girls (and their parents!) are comfortable with Dora the way she is. Besides, Nickelodeon has Spongebob and we all know about his cross-generational appeal. There are men in their late twenties living in their parent's basements that can't get enough of that guy.

New Dora will not be banned in my house. I don't think it will be necessary. My girls relate to Dora the Explorer, not Dora the Mallrat. If anything, I think Diego will start to have more appeal. That is, at least until his voice deepens and he starts to sprout facial hair.

Top 10 Reasons Why I wouldn't trade my Mother for all the money in the World... VIA Her Quotes...

10- "Jimmy, I told you not to let me cook or use knives when I'm drinking!"

9- "I LOVE HIM SO MUCH"- she says this after anyone talks about Rex her grandson.

8- "Cari, will you consider Eloping and having a baby now... seriously"

7- on my Voice Mail "Cari, this is your mother... why aren't you answering your phone?" This is said in my favorite high pitch southern voice.

6- "Cari, Can you call your sister?"

5-"Y'ALL STOP MAKING FUN OF ME!"

4-"hey, do that voice of that guy on that show... com'on do it for me"

3-"Casey... would I like Pineapple Express?"

2-" LUDJ YOU!" she says this in emails and in person.. its her cute way of saying love you!

1-"I love you"- People don't say this enough to their kids... my mother has said it to me everyday for 25 years.

bonus reason: she's crazy.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, Boyfriend?!?

Can someone please explain this to me?

Note: I didn't notice the dog eating off the kitchen chair until I uploaded this pic. And sorry for the shit-tastic picture. It was taken with my POS cell phone.

....But YOU'RE the one who has to wear it FOREVER!

So, just in case you have never gone shopping for a wedding band let me start by saying .. its truly a fun and heartwarming experience. To buy something that symbolizes something so monumental in our lives yet, such a sweet and ancient message.

Did you know what the ancient Greeks started wearing rings on the 4th finger of the left hand because it was supposed to be a direct line to your heart?


Fiance and I recently purchased our rings, and I love them. It's amazing how men are such different creatures sometimes... Here's how buying his ring went..



"Baby, you need to tell me what kind of ring you want"


"one that fits on my finger... oh and is black."


"That's it, that's all the requirements?


"Yep, I'll wear whatever you like best"


"So I'll Pick it out and You will Wear it FOREVER"


..fiance makes a pucking noise because he's a romantic...


"YES CARI!"


"FINE"



But me however, it needed to match my engagement ring, and be pretty on its own. Now my engagement ring isn't very traditional so it was so hard for find one that didn't' get lost next to it. So the ring we bought for Fiance, which in the stores was anywhere from 200-400 bucks I found the same brand and design on Overstock.com for $70, and the ring we bought for me, of course I had to go back to the store like 6 times, and try on rings at every other jewelry store first, and take pictures of it on my cell phone and send it to friends to see what they thought...Now we have them and they do not match, do not look traditional in any sense of the word.. but we love them, and I love that we bought mine on Valentines day 5 minutes before the store closed. The clerk asked me if i wanted to wear it out of the store.. truth is YES I DID!! Why wouldn't I.. diamonds are kinda fun.. but there is also something exciting in knowing that this piece of jewelry is much more than a good deal or a perfect fit.. its a very serious commitment that in 7 months I will be making, and I can't wait!

** Note, mine is much shinier in person!**

**Next to the engagment ring**

Valentine's Day, Schmalentine's Day

So I had someone ask me today if I had made any "big Valentine's Day weekend plans" with my significant other. What? Are people seriously making a weekend out of this because Valentine's Day is on a Saturday? When I told him that we weren't really doing anything he said that my guy was a lucky man because if he doesn't spend at least $200 on his wife then she doesn't speak with him for weeks. I'm hoping that this woman is in the minority becasue if not, then I really feel sorry for you guys...

We went out to dinner for our first Valentine's Day. We agreed that there would be no gift exchange, so that part was easy. Dinner was insanely busy at the restaurant (big surprise, huh?) so we decided that night that we probably weren't going to do that again. I think we may be going out to dinner sometime after Valentine's Day this year, but if we don't get around to it, I will not feel un-loved. Valentine's Day has always been just a "greeting card holiday" to me. I just never really found it that important.

I remember realizing that Valentine's Day sucked when I was in Middle School. The student council always had a fundraiser where you could buy valentines and/or carnations and have them delivered to your "special someone's" homeroom on Valentine's Day as a surprise. For three years I hoped that I would have something waiting for me on top of my desk when I walked into first period. And for three years - nothing. Imagine my sad little face looking around to see everyone else's flowers and then looking back at my empty desk. I like to think that was a character building experience and that it helped me become the well-adjusted adult that I am. The reason I think this is because all of those girls who got flowers are now whores.

So this year, take me out to dinner on a night when I don't have to wait 45 minutes for a table after we have already made reservations weeks ahead of time. Or maybe you could cook me dinner. Hell, I'll even do the dishes! And then, maybe some wine...for me. You will be left in charge of making sure the kids have been fed and bathed before being dragged to bed, kicking and screaming because they want ONE MORE DORA!!!! I'll be watching my Netflix and drinking my bottle of Red Cat. It will be the best Valentine's Day ever!

If you're in a bad mood...

This is why I am afraid to have kids... WHAT IF THEY ARE NOT THIS CUTE!

I was in a kind of a mood until I found this link I had sent to Rachel a long time ago...

Enjoy.

So Maybe We Need a 3 Bedroom House

We live in a two bedroom place with two girls. It's temporary, but it works for now. The baby just recently moved from our bedroom to her sister's room because she was ready for the "big girl crib". By "ready" I mean she was sleeping through the night for the most part and there was a slim chance that she would wake up Big Sister.

Everything had been going swimmingly until Little Sister got sick a couple weeks ago. She had a nasty chest cold and a double ear infection so she was up periodically throughout the night hacking, crying, screaming and just plain pissed off that she was sick. Big Sister only woke up once during the two week stretch to complain about the baby keeping her up, so I thought we were doing pretty good.

Last night, Little Sister slept through the night, which meant that their father and I also slept through the night because we didn't have to sleep with a hacking, crying, screaming pissed off baby. In fact, I slept so soundly that I didn't even hear Big Sister come in our room and crawl into bed with us. When I got out of bed, I notcied she was in there and there was something on her head. When I leaned in closer, I started laughing. Hysterically.

She was wearing her earmuffs! Not the kind that keep you warm - the kind that protect your ears from loud noises.* Yes, she went to bed anticipating that fact that her sister would probably be keeping her up again and she was going to use the proper ear protection. It's just too bad she can't appreciate the irony in that fact that the first night she decided to use the headgear was the first night here sister decided to sleep all night.

*We have earmuffs for the girls because their dad is an avid race fan and we frequent the local track. Not because we're weirdos.