Friday, March 27, 2009
Fiance: "Look he loves the sherbet kisses..."
Me, as I am slowly realizing what he said versus what he meant and Laughing so Hard I'm peeing a little:
"Don't you mean Raspberries"
Fiance: "You know what I meant asshole."
Me: Still Laughing uncontrollably.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Now, You Tube didn't' happen yesterday or anything but shit man can I waste some time there. I think I am in head over heals slap you on the ass in love with it. I love that if I want to reminisce about my childhood and watch a full episode of Kids Incorporated.. I can. It's comforting to know that its ok that I had a crush on a cartoon and If i want to watch a 4min 24 second clip of Daria just to see Trent I can! Endless possibilities. How can you resist reliving your favorite moments of Saved By the Bell, you know the episode when Jesse gets hooked on caffeine pills and sings "I'm so excited" over and over.. until Zack confronts her or if you get in an argument with your fiance about what as the Second Video ever Played on MTV and everyone knows that the first was "Video Killed the Radio Star.. the answer, "You Better Run" By Pat Benetar is only one search away. When I was in high school and college those VH1 clip shows were really popular.. and still are a bit... and my dream job was to be an editor for them and just sit and go through hours and hours of footage. Now, can make my own clip show of Rider Strong from Boy Meets World and Old Cheri Oteri SNL clips.
I kind of hate that my kids or anyone else ever for that matter, won't have the experience of getting to relieve your favorite show from your childhood 15 years later, because now all you have to do is wait 10 minutes after the episode has aired and BAM.. there it is on the web some where. Hopefully my kids will want to go outside and play while mommy sits in side and laughs her ass off at a clip of Steve Erkel Shrieking..."Did I do That..."
Alas.. I'll leave you with Possibly my favorite childhood memory...
They really don't make kids shows this awesome anymore.
I love You, You Tube.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Me: Your hands-they smell like girl's lotion
Him: Why in the hell would I be using girl's lotion?
Me: I don't know. I'm just telling you what I think you smell like.
Him: So you think I smell like a girl?
Me: Right now you do. I mean if you like that kind of stuff, you're welcome to use anything of mine...
Him: Yeah right! Just so you know, it's called GoJo and it's hand cleaner for mechanics.
Me: Lady Mechanics?
Saturday, March 14, 2009
That I actually failed that Intro to Business class and am Paying for a Degree I don't have.
When I get out of the shower I open the bathroom door and there is a stranger on my couch.
A water snake in my toilet.
I buy my wedding dress at the perfect size and find out the next day that I'm pregnant.
Someone hands me a newborn and it slips through my fingers.
An intruder hiding in my house for days without anyone noticing.
Something that I really said a long time ago that I now realize was completely embarrassing and immature... plays over and over.
It's weird I know... but it happens to everyone.. what would be on your list.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Apparently the Nickelodeon and Mattel have found out (from who?) that the Kindergarten set are too cool for Dora, tossing her aside for dolls like Bratz. So they have decided to do the creepiest thing possible and make Dora look like a slut. They have released a sillhouette of what the "new" Dora will look like:
Yup. I'm a little scared too. Why is she standing like that? Is she wearing a mini skirt? Dora doesn't wear skirts-she wears shorts! And how can she expect to go on adventures wearing ballet flats? Where are her sneakers?
Now I have done my share of bitching about Dora. In fact, my girls can only watch it if I am not in the room because I really just cannot handle it. But it's not a show for me. It's for preschoolers. And they love it. My 3 year old has a larger Spanish vocabulary than I have, and I studied that language for 4 years in high school. When we're coloring, she asks me to pass her "amarillo" when she wants the yellow crayon. Will we be learning the Spanish word for "totally" when the new Dora is revealed?
Kids outgrow things. It happens. I think the better way to approach this may have been to create a family member (a la Diego) for the older crowd. Maybe an older bobble-headed cousin if that's the demographic they want to reach out to. To make your cartoon characters age is stange and creepy. Especially since so many girls (and their parents!) are comfortable with Dora the way she is. Besides, Nickelodeon has Spongebob and we all know about his cross-generational appeal. There are men in their late twenties living in their parent's basements that can't get enough of that guy.
New Dora will not be banned in my house. I don't think it will be necessary. My girls relate to Dora the Explorer, not Dora the Mallrat. If anything, I think Diego will start to have more appeal. That is, at least until his voice deepens and he starts to sprout facial hair.