Friday, November 27, 2009
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
OK What the F! First of all, I understand if you are a collector, but usually collectors keep their stuff in good shape, and by good shape I MEAN WITH CLOTHES ON! There were literally boxes and boxes of these dolls, and what's with the lone Santa Suit? Creepy, dude, Creepy.
Oh right.. there's more.
Gotta Love Summer!
Monday, June 1, 2009
BEST GAME EVER! I can't stop playing it..its like heroine for someone who is too cheap and scared to actually use heroine. I love it. I am pretty too (even though its still on easy.. HEY THE METALLICA VERSION IS HARDER THAN THE OTHER PRISSY LEDGENS OF ROCK OR WHATEVER VERSIONS)
My eyes turn completely red after about 2 hours of not blinking and the other day I almost peed my pants because Metallica songs never end! Try playing Merciful Fate... Fiance calls it 12 minutes of Satan... maybe its because you eyes fall out of your head and arms fall off when you hit about 9 minutes.
So friends...if I don't answer my cell...
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Monday, April 6, 2009
putting on jeans immediately after coming out of the dryer, Reese's, spaghetti with meat sauce, boys with tattoos, fiance's with beards, dogs named anakin, cats named Vader, mozzarella cheese, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Davey Havok (still), men's watches, fuchsia, walks, warm days, target's dollar section, boneless buffalo wings, big earrings, snuffalufagus, getting paid, notebooks, a good pen, house plants, painting a new room, my nephew, reading the UK Daily Mail, tetris, fun post-its, Dr. Pepper, Kristen Stewart, my wedding dress, baking, asian babies, bobby pins, zebras.
I don't' like...
snow, washing dishes, lotion, cream cheese, baby pink, Italian sausage, rude people, The Jonas Brothers, grant writing, math, push ups, pull ups (the exercise not the diaper thing), sweet pickles, wings that are too spicy, bbq pizza, 19 versions of CSI, bossy people, the guy who looks like Justin Timberlake (a little) on American Idol, cold feet, wet socks, Care Bears, people who don't respond quickly to my emails, Diet Pepsi, crushed red peppers, spam email, the lure of the lottery, how popcorn will aways get stuck somewhere in your teeth, losing touch, FYE, that I really liked Twilight, changing the clocks, hornets/wasps, Lady GaGa, feta cheese, flat hair.
Ironically My likes are a bit more mature.. my dislikes... pretty much exactly the same.
Friday, March 27, 2009
Fiance: "Look he loves the sherbet kisses..."
Me, as I am slowly realizing what he said versus what he meant and Laughing so Hard I'm peeing a little:
"Don't you mean Raspberries"
Fiance: "You know what I meant asshole."
Me: Still Laughing uncontrollably.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Now, You Tube didn't' happen yesterday or anything but shit man can I waste some time there. I think I am in head over heals slap you on the ass in love with it. I love that if I want to reminisce about my childhood and watch a full episode of Kids Incorporated.. I can. It's comforting to know that its ok that I had a crush on a cartoon and If i want to watch a 4min 24 second clip of Daria just to see Trent I can! Endless possibilities. How can you resist reliving your favorite moments of Saved By the Bell, you know the episode when Jesse gets hooked on caffeine pills and sings "I'm so excited" over and over.. until Zack confronts her or if you get in an argument with your fiance about what as the Second Video ever Played on MTV and everyone knows that the first was "Video Killed the Radio Star.. the answer, "You Better Run" By Pat Benetar is only one search away. When I was in high school and college those VH1 clip shows were really popular.. and still are a bit... and my dream job was to be an editor for them and just sit and go through hours and hours of footage. Now, can make my own clip show of Rider Strong from Boy Meets World and Old Cheri Oteri SNL clips.
I kind of hate that my kids or anyone else ever for that matter, won't have the experience of getting to relieve your favorite show from your childhood 15 years later, because now all you have to do is wait 10 minutes after the episode has aired and BAM.. there it is on the web some where. Hopefully my kids will want to go outside and play while mommy sits in side and laughs her ass off at a clip of Steve Erkel Shrieking..."Did I do That..."
Alas.. I'll leave you with Possibly my favorite childhood memory...
They really don't make kids shows this awesome anymore.
I love You, You Tube.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Me: Your hands-they smell like girl's lotion
Him: Why in the hell would I be using girl's lotion?
Me: I don't know. I'm just telling you what I think you smell like.
Him: So you think I smell like a girl?
Me: Right now you do. I mean if you like that kind of stuff, you're welcome to use anything of mine...
Him: Yeah right! Just so you know, it's called GoJo and it's hand cleaner for mechanics.
Me: Lady Mechanics?
Saturday, March 14, 2009
That I actually failed that Intro to Business class and am Paying for a Degree I don't have.
When I get out of the shower I open the bathroom door and there is a stranger on my couch.
A water snake in my toilet.
I buy my wedding dress at the perfect size and find out the next day that I'm pregnant.
Someone hands me a newborn and it slips through my fingers.
An intruder hiding in my house for days without anyone noticing.
Something that I really said a long time ago that I now realize was completely embarrassing and immature... plays over and over.
It's weird I know... but it happens to everyone.. what would be on your list.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Apparently the Nickelodeon and Mattel have found out (from who?) that the Kindergarten set are too cool for Dora, tossing her aside for dolls like Bratz. So they have decided to do the creepiest thing possible and make Dora look like a slut. They have released a sillhouette of what the "new" Dora will look like:
Yup. I'm a little scared too. Why is she standing like that? Is she wearing a mini skirt? Dora doesn't wear skirts-she wears shorts! And how can she expect to go on adventures wearing ballet flats? Where are her sneakers?
Now I have done my share of bitching about Dora. In fact, my girls can only watch it if I am not in the room because I really just cannot handle it. But it's not a show for me. It's for preschoolers. And they love it. My 3 year old has a larger Spanish vocabulary than I have, and I studied that language for 4 years in high school. When we're coloring, she asks me to pass her "amarillo" when she wants the yellow crayon. Will we be learning the Spanish word for "totally" when the new Dora is revealed?
Kids outgrow things. It happens. I think the better way to approach this may have been to create a family member (a la Diego) for the older crowd. Maybe an older bobble-headed cousin if that's the demographic they want to reach out to. To make your cartoon characters age is stange and creepy. Especially since so many girls (and their parents!) are comfortable with Dora the way she is. Besides, Nickelodeon has Spongebob and we all know about his cross-generational appeal. There are men in their late twenties living in their parent's basements that can't get enough of that guy.
New Dora will not be banned in my house. I don't think it will be necessary. My girls relate to Dora the Explorer, not Dora the Mallrat. If anything, I think Diego will start to have more appeal. That is, at least until his voice deepens and he starts to sprout facial hair.
Friday, February 20, 2009
9- "I LOVE HIM SO MUCH"- she says this after anyone talks about Rex her grandson.
8- "Cari, will you consider Eloping and having a baby now... seriously"
7- on my Voice Mail "Cari, this is your mother... why aren't you answering your phone?" This is said in my favorite high pitch southern voice.
6- "Cari, Can you call your sister?"
5-"Y'ALL STOP MAKING FUN OF ME!"
4-"hey, do that voice of that guy on that show... com'on do it for me"
3-"Casey... would I like Pineapple Express?"
2-" LUDJ YOU!" she says this in emails and in person.. its her cute way of saying love you!
1-"I love you"- People don't say this enough to their kids... my mother has said it to me everyday for 25 years.
bonus reason: she's crazy.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Did you know what the ancient Greeks started wearing rings on the 4th finger of the left hand because it was supposed to be a direct line to your heart?
Fiance and I recently purchased our rings, and I love them. It's amazing how men are such different creatures sometimes... Here's how buying his ring went..
"Baby, you need to tell me what kind of ring you want"
"one that fits on my finger... oh and is black."
"That's it, that's all the requirements?
"Yep, I'll wear whatever you like best"
"So I'll Pick it out and You will Wear it FOREVER"
..fiance makes a pucking noise because he's a romantic...
But me however, it needed to match my engagement ring, and be pretty on its own. Now my engagement ring isn't very traditional so it was so hard for find one that didn't' get lost next to it. So the ring we bought for Fiance, which in the stores was anywhere from 200-400 bucks I found the same brand and design on Overstock.com for $70, and the ring we bought for me, of course I had to go back to the store like 6 times, and try on rings at every other jewelry store first, and take pictures of it on my cell phone and send it to friends to see what they thought...Now we have them and they do not match, do not look traditional in any sense of the word.. but we love them, and I love that we bought mine on Valentines day 5 minutes before the store closed. The clerk asked me if i wanted to wear it out of the store.. truth is YES I DID!! Why wouldn't I.. diamonds are kinda fun.. but there is also something exciting in knowing that this piece of jewelry is much more than a good deal or a perfect fit.. its a very serious commitment that in 7 months I will be making, and I can't wait!
** Note, mine is much shinier in person!**
**Next to the engagment ring**
Thursday, February 12, 2009
We went out to dinner for our first Valentine's Day. We agreed that there would be no gift exchange, so that part was easy. Dinner was insanely busy at the restaurant (big surprise, huh?) so we decided that night that we probably weren't going to do that again. I think we may be going out to dinner sometime after Valentine's Day this year, but if we don't get around to it, I will not feel un-loved. Valentine's Day has always been just a "greeting card holiday" to me. I just never really found it that important.
I remember realizing that Valentine's Day sucked when I was in Middle School. The student council always had a fundraiser where you could buy valentines and/or carnations and have them delivered to your "special someone's" homeroom on Valentine's Day as a surprise. For three years I hoped that I would have something waiting for me on top of my desk when I walked into first period. And for three years - nothing. Imagine my sad little face looking around to see everyone else's flowers and then looking back at my empty desk. I like to think that was a character building experience and that it helped me become the well-adjusted adult that I am. The reason I think this is because all of those girls who got flowers are now whores.
So this year, take me out to dinner on a night when I don't have to wait 45 minutes for a table after we have already made reservations weeks ahead of time. Or maybe you could cook me dinner. Hell, I'll even do the dishes! And then, maybe some wine...for me. You will be left in charge of making sure the kids have been fed and bathed before being dragged to bed, kicking and screaming because they want ONE MORE DORA!!!! I'll be watching my Netflix and drinking my bottle of Red Cat. It will be the best Valentine's Day ever!
Friday, February 6, 2009
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Everything had been going swimmingly until Little Sister got sick a couple weeks ago. She had a nasty chest cold and a double ear infection so she was up periodically throughout the night hacking, crying, screaming and just plain pissed off that she was sick. Big Sister only woke up once during the two week stretch to complain about the baby keeping her up, so I thought we were doing pretty good.
Last night, Little Sister slept through the night, which meant that their father and I also slept through the night because we didn't have to sleep with a hacking, crying, screaming pissed off baby. In fact, I slept so soundly that I didn't even hear Big Sister come in our room and crawl into bed with us. When I got out of bed, I notcied she was in there and there was something on her head. When I leaned in closer, I started laughing. Hysterically.
She was wearing her earmuffs! Not the kind that keep you warm - the kind that protect your ears from loud noises.* Yes, she went to bed anticipating that fact that her sister would probably be keeping her up again and she was going to use the proper ear protection. It's just too bad she can't appreciate the irony in that fact that the first night she decided to use the headgear was the first night here sister decided to sleep all night.
*We have earmuffs for the girls because their dad is an avid race fan and we frequent the local track. Not because we're weirdos.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
9- "Ugh.. is it still snowing?!" - This is said when anyone enters the doors covered in snow.
8-" Do we get presidents day off? Nope."
7- (in passing...) "Ugh.. is it lunch time yet?"
6- "Hey I Left you a voicemail!"- this is followed up by telling the person every word you said in the voicemail.
5-“hey!! Boss isn’t here today”.. “uh oh… party!”
4-"Is your Internet working?"
3- "Hey Boss!"
2- "Did you get the memo?"
1-"must be a Monday"- this is followed by you punching that person.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
I know I’m not the only one who feels this way…
(Rachel, this is where you come in...)
I am a white woman who is excited to see Obama become the next President of the United States. A lot of Americans are excited about it. And some Americans are not. Some NNY Residents are not. All you have to do is tune in to a local radio show in the morning and listen for yourself to see how intolerant of a region this is.
To me, the piece sounds like it was written to try to make it seem like we are a culturally diverse area. And really – we’re not. There are residents here that throw around the “N” like it’s an acceptable part of their vocabulary. Truth be told, they’ve never been called out on it. They say it because there is pretty much no chance that they will get their ass kicked for it. There are bars in Watertown that will not allow soldiers as patrons. They will deny you access because you have an “out of state license”. What better way to say “We don’t like outsiders” that that?
This article (North Country Blacks Excited about Obama) was attempting something noble, but if you look beneath the surface, it failed miserably.
**Amendment- Even if Black is the AP term- to us it does not invoke community, which is what we should be striving for in such a small one.. also, The AP uses Black, as in Watertown Black Residents, it does not use the plural as inNorth Country Blacks...
Monday, January 19, 2009
1. Coyote (kahy-oh-tee or kahy-oht) I looked it up. We're both right. Having been laughed out of the room while using the first pronounciation of the word among a group of men dressed head to toe in camo and equipped with guns, I will be sticking to the latter version. Especially when referring to coyote hunting. Which brings me to...
2. Hunting (huh-in) Apparently the first n, the t and the g are all silent in this word. We don't really use the g for the majority of words that we say. It's just there to make the word look pretty. So if someone tells you they are going coyote hunting and don't pronounce it, "Goin kahy-ote huh-in" then they are lying. Or they are a poseur.
3. For (fer) Example: I'm goin to the store fer some milk. (Note: Some pronounce milk "melk", but they are stupid). Usually, you are talking fast enough when you say this that no one will really pick up on it. The only time it will really get noticed is when you use it in the middle of a sentence and then forget what you were going to say. Ex: I got that stuff fer...... See, now you just sound like an idiot. I know. I've done it. Lesson learned.
4. Yup and Nope (yuht and noht) "Yup" and "Nope" are slang words to begin with, but we've taken it one step further: We've eliminated the p at the end. If you are going to use these words, I stongly advise you not to do so in a professional environment or a job interview. I would never hire someone who answered "yuht" or "noht" to any question that I asked. At least put the p back at the end.
By the way, NNY gave us Potato Chips. Is there really a clear winner here?
Of course 13 is a hard age for any kid, needless to say a kid in a new town with a funny accent. But here's what I noticed... YOU PEOPLE HAVE ACCENTS TOO! That's right... I'll never forget one day my friend, who has always lived in Upstate NY, said, "I don't understand the southern accent, I mean, don't they get that everyone else sounds the same and they don't" Well, I guess she didn't realize that the south isn't one tiny corner of our country.. most of us have some sort of regional accent, and since I spent my middle school days being picked on for my silly southern one, and I have witnessed many people talk to my mother, like she is stupid just because of her accent.. I am here to get my revenge! Listen up NNY.. because you (read in a southern accent..) DON'T TALK RIGHT EITHER!
1. Coyote (kahy-oh-tee)- Many Northern New Yorkers say this word with out the "e" sound at the end, look it up people.
2. Roof- dictionary key same- This is NOT pronounced RUF. That is the noise that comes out of a dogs mouth.. you do NOT need to shovel your RUF. You need to Shovel your ROOF!
3. Creek (kreek)- This word is pronounced just like its spelled. It is not pronounced.. CRICK. That is something you might get in your neck after sleeping wrong, or a sound the stairs make in an old house... NOT A BODY OF WATER. Just like meek, or reek, or geek. They all have the same vowel sound, you wouldn't say.. "your such a GIK" so why would you say.."i went down to the CRICK?!! please stop it.
4. SO DON'T I. This is often said when someone is agreeing with something that is being said "Oh Man I love www.podunkposh.com" ... "Oh really, SO DON'T I!!" um.. your negating what you are trying to say. What your really saying when you can't use proper grammar and say.. So Don't I, is "I don't". This may sound foreign to you, but I promise you'll catch it next time its said.
So these are just a FEW things that really get me. I'm not trying to be bitchy, but if you think that just because someone has a southern accent they are stupid, or must not be as up to date as you remember 2 things... 1- Chances are, you are not using proper grammar either, 2- Atlanta gave us Coca-Cola, and Waffle House.. therefore THE SOUTH WINS!
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
2. If I didn't comb my hair, nobody would judge me for it.
3. If I wanted to wear camouflage pants to my birthday party, that would be cool
4. Play Doh
5. No one would ever look at my artwork and tell me to make changes
"These are 2 guys. The pink one is sad and has two suns
on his arms. The blue one is happy and bigger." ~Natali, Age 3
7. My Little Pony underwear
8. If I was cranky, everyone would just know that I was tired
9. If I wanted to stop a Top Ten list at number 9, I could
Monday, January 12, 2009
So my first thought, living in a very rural area...I WILL NOT GET MARRIED IN A FIRE HALL. Now, thank god that is not the case. I wanna plan something fairly simple yet... posh. So to get some guidance Ihave now attended 2 wedding shows. One here in Watertown and one in Syracuse.
The one in Watertown I think was as to be expected, a good show, a little small. But they had one of everything at least, jewelers, DJ's, Photographers, cake people, florist, make-up, dress/tux shops.. ect. I got what I needed out of a few good ideas..
Now the one is Syracuse...which isn't NYC but a much bigger place than Watertown, WAS A JOKE. No jewelers, I think I saw one cake person, ONLY ONE DRESS SHOP!!, and lots of photographers, DJ's and reception places. There was a fashion show on the hour which was cute and they guys came out and performed little choreographed dances and the old ladies whooped it up because, lets be honest, that's the most excitement you're getting from men in this area. But I'm paying for parking, paying to get into the show, and you only have 1 dress shop! What is the point? The no jeweler thing kills me, even if I were eloping, I'd be buying jewelry.. umm.. Rings! I even think you talk about rings in at your ceremony.. you know..with this ring.. blahblah blah..not with this awesome gourmet company I the wedd.. I was a bit disappointed for how promoted it was! And the vendors ...they had a ton of Photogs, and reception halls i have both.. http://www.jbassphoto.com/ check out my photographer.. AMAZING!
* side note I won him in a silent auction... such a money saver!
Rachel will be doing my invitations, so the few things I really needed help with they didn't' have.. so hopefully I will be able to log my experiences here and have a very posh wedding in a very podunk place!
Thank God, one of my awesome bridesmaids went with me.. we also stopped and tried on bridesmaid dresses!
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Friday, January 9, 2009
"If you win, Leave... Have fun!!"
"I'm going to be drinking Vodka and Grapefruit and hitting MAX BET BABY!"
"I'm so Proud!"
and yes, we end everything we say with an exclamation mark.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
And then something very weird happened...
I got my Netflix in the mail about a month ago and was so excited, because the only DVD's our player has ever seen include Dora, Diego and Tom & Jerry. So when "The Strangers" showed up in my mailbox, I couldn't wait to get the kids to bed and watch it. I got through the first 5 minutes and was totally terrified and had to stop the movie. I know - what the hell? Nothing even happens it the first 5 minutes! I don't even think there was any talking yet! So, no big deal - I'll just send it back and get my next movie. Because obviously a brief flashback scene and two people moping around a house is just too damn scary for me.
So when "Zodiac" came, I put that sucker in and made it about 3 minutes. I got to the part where the couple is parked and a car pulls up in the background. Nope - can't handle it - Eject. Seriously? Seriously. What in the name of Alfred Hitchcock is the matter with me? Is it because these two movies are "based on actual events"? Did giving birth negate my " I love scary shit" gene? Whetever it is, I need to fix it. It's embarassing.
So, Netflix - I will be anxiously awaiting the next movie in my queue, Peter Pan.
Monday, January 5, 2009
1- Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, while dogs only have about ten
2- Stewardesses’ is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand
3- Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards, and are on the Australian coat of arms for that reason.
4- It was discovered on a space mission that a frog can throw up. The frog throws up its stomach first, so the stomach is dangling out of its mouth. Then the frog uses its forearms to dig out all of the stomach’s contents and then swallows the stomach back down again.
5- The New Kids on the Block are still performing “You Got the Right Stuff” along with the “New Kid Dance”
6- A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.
7- Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur.
8- The word “set” has more definitions than any other word in the English language.
9- Odontophobia is the fear of teeth
10- Kansas state law requires pedestrians crossing the highways at night to wear tail lights.
Friday, January 2, 2009
1. Make a Reece's Peanut Butter Cup Fat/Calorie Free and have it taste exactly the same.
2. Change People's reactions to Kathy Griffin Swearing. I know she lives for it, but our societies reaction to a swear word has got to stop. This morning more than one major web site's headline has something to do with Kathy Griffin swearing at some NYC Partier on New Years Eve as she co-hosted events on CNN with Anderson Cooper. UM...WHO F*N CARES!! Last time I checked the middle east was still exploding, our weather is all messed up, people are still starving, people are still dying of AIDS and we look the other way... Kathy Griffin telling off some heckler is NOT a big deal. First of all, we know she's gonna do it, that's why CNN hired her, she makes me laugh and Anderson Cooper laugh, so why is it such a shock when she said it..AFTER MIDNIGHT.
Last I checked she was ringing in 2009 not 1909. Get Over it. People swear and show their ankles in public. I probably just blew some peoples mind with that tidbit.
3. Wear this hat everywhere because its awesome...
Happy New Year!